I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
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