what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
