can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
Randomize
