I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
