I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
