oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
i think my mom watched the whole time
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
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