well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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