Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize