I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize
