Soap is not a condiment
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Need sex. Gaining weight.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
