Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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