When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
