Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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