So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
I think i got beer on your cat.
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