Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Randomize
