This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
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