at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
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