Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
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