I hate your face
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
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