I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
