Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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