can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
