i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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