Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
At least with the last gf I made it clear that I wanted to breakup when I pissed on her floor @ 3am as her roommate watched in contempt
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
