So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
