Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
