I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I wish i was in the wii world.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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