Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
Randomize
