I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
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