i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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