just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
A cab driver remembered me by name, address, and ex fuck buddys nick name from a year ago. I mustve been one memorable shit show.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
