He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
