Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Randomize
