Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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