that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
