you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
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