butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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