office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
You sat on a wall pretending to be a gargoyle before shouting "batman!" and jumping at me
I'm the drunk Des Moines deserves, but not the one it needs
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Randomize
