lets start a swedish sibling band together
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
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