Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
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