Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
This is possibly the most humiliating moment of my life. I have diarrhea, in a port-a-potty, at the Renaissance Festival.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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