Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
