would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
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