Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Randomize
