i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize