i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
