after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize