you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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