p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I thought you might think I was an idiot who thought cock rings prevent STDs,
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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