she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Randomize
