why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Randomize
