She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
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